![]() It’s an emotional response to a brain on overload. Out of control – can’t stop even if you fix triggerĪ meltdown is not a choice. Tantrum stops as soon as they get their way Overload of emotions, stimulation, demandsĪ performance for an audience manipulationĬontinues whether or not someone is watching Goal-Oriented: they’re using it to get something TantrumĪ behavior choice – upstairs brain decisionĮmotional reaction – downstairs brain hijacks But our rule is _.” When they discover this behavior doesn’t gain them anything, they give up on it and the tantrum ends. ![]() “I hear you really want _ and you’re upset I’m saying no. Kids who learn they can get you to change the rules if they tantrum will do it a lot! You can empathize with the feelings but restate the limit. If they tantrum to manipulate, don’t give a lot of attention, and don’t give in. You want to guide them away from choosing this behavior, and toward positive ways of achieving their goals. They will stop if there is no audience, they’ll stop if it’s not working to get them what they want.Ī tantrum is a discipline issue. They may be more likely to do this on a day when they’re hungry or tired or overwhelmed, but the tantrum itself is a behavior choice (an upstairs brain decision). TantrumĪ tantrum is when a child chooses to do these behaviors, with the goal of getting something they want or making you agree to something you’d said no to. Understanding which it is guides your response. When you see a child throw themselves to the ground, or scream, sob, flail or hit, there are two very different things that may be happening. ![]() But any one can have one given enough stressors. We often think of meltdowns and tantrums as a toddler behavior, but they still happen with older children (even adults!) Meltdowns are more common for neurodiverse children, including kids with autism, anxiety and sensory processing disorders.
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